Everything I Hate (And Love) In J-Pop-Land: Kana Nishino’s “LOVE one.” (Review)

Today we’re going to talk about Kana Nishino’s debut full album, “LOVE one.” This album, released in June 2009, reached #4 on Japanese pop charts, and sold over 200,000 copies. To give perspective as to Nishino’s growing popularity, her 2010 CD “To Love” sold over 500,000 copies, and is #1 on charts. Why are we talking about the old album and not the new? Because we’re interested in roots, that’s why! And it’s also what we had on-hand.

Nishino’s debut album includes all sorts of theme song singles for TV anime and film. We’ll get into the details of that after the jump. Until then, let me prepare you: I generally loathe real-life lolicon pop stars, and I get that strong impression from Nishino. But is there something enjoyable, something easy and appealing, about her music? Find out after the jump!

one. tracklist.

01 *Prologue*~Kirari~
02 Tokutemo feat.WISE (trans. “No Matter How Far”)
03 doll
04 Girlfriend
05 Kimi no Koe o feat.VERBAL(m-flo) (trans. “Your Voice”)
06 Style.
07 Life goes on…
08 I
09 candy
10 MAKE UP
11 glowly days
12 celtic
13 Kimi ni Aitaku Naru Kara (trans. “Because I’ve Grown to Miss You”)
14 *Epilogue*~LOVE one.~

Let’s start with the theme songs. Track 6, “Style,” was used as the 2nd ending theme to the TV anime Soul Eater. It’s one of the better tracks on the album; Nishino’s voice is filtered, copied, autotuned, and otherwise effect-laden throughout the verses, and is slightly less filtered through the chorus. Lots of chord changes and a bouncy, flavorful melody keep the listener’s attention well.

“Kirari” is a theme song to the original net animation “Chocolate Underground.” I could do without Nishino’s attempts to embellish the high notes, but the instrumental backing is a lovely pop ballad piece with swelling strings and a constant rhythmic push.

“MAKE UP,” another theme on the aforementioned “Chocolate Underground,” has a really awesome pre-chorus section with a guitar build to complement an interesting vocal melody. The rest of the song I could do without, but it’s nice to hear those little moments of catchy genius. Songwriters everywhere are jealous of those who write hooks like these.

To my knowledge, that’s the extent of the music associated with animation. The rest is original music. And much of the original music is just… disgraceful.

Let’s take some time to talk about the worst song on the album, which is also one of the worst piece of J-pop I’ve ever heard. EVER. The song is “Candy.” Here’s a sampling of the mostly-English lyrics.

Walking down the street and we see some hot guys
Right, or left, I really can’t decide
“Eh, cho maji?!” there’s girls with them
We are more “Moreteru” than your dumb girlfriend

The song is so bad, it’s almost good. I enjoy tearing it down the same way one enjoys talking about/quoting The Room with friends. The only redeeming part of the piece is when the speak-and-spell voice spells out “C A N D Y.”

It’s a little disturbing to hear songs about teen rivalry, romance, and the objectification of both male and female bodies mixed with innocent, kid-friendly pop songs on one album. It reminds me of early Britney Spears. Mindless, senseless pop with strong production and confused/confusing messages.

Now if that’s your thing, more power to you. Me? I don’t think I can stand to listen to any more Kana Nishino. There is something terribly puerile about this singer and the marketing machine behind her; the bits I’ve heard from her second album suggest that style isn’t going away anytime soon.

Should you want this album, you can get the limited edition (SECL-790~1) with bonus DVD (includes six music videos), or the standard edition (SECL-792).